Almost Gone

well...been awhile since i've posted.I was in such a drugged fog,Joan had to fill in for me. I'M BACK! It's been slow progress in terms of PT.I can't move my leg on my own while in bed,but using a walker,I can..sorta move it..but still,it's progress. We've had to stay 2 more days here than necessary because of "communications breakdown" (a zep fav),but hopefully,today's the day...or I"m gonna walk home. I got to see myself for the first time yesterday,as it was the first trip into our bathroom for a shampoo,sponge bath,and a look into the giant mirror...freaked! Wildman from the woods of Quantico.I'm ready for halloween. My leg scar is healing nicely,although a bit shocked at the size of the femur they removed...should be fun at airports.The phone calls and Emails have been a true Godsend..There have been soooo many.thankyou everyone I have never felt so much love.I love you all so much. As far as what lies ahead,I am still in search mode,but have a very strong pull towards Mr Bill's route...Mexico.I think the degree at which I am exposed might preclude the NIH route.If I do go to Mexico,it will be very soon.I can't wait much longer.Today we're hopeful to be transported to Health South Rehab in Salisbury,maybe there for 5-7 days,then....Mexico.More later,Rick

Leg is still healing

Rick is sleeping quietly. His leg is healing well. They are keeping us here in the Washington Hospital Center until he is physically able to get around without help. Fine with me. Our room is expensive, but very comfortable, with a fold out couch I can sleep on. Although the meals are not as healthy as our food at home, it is a blessing to have someone bring it and then take the dishes away when we are done. Because of our wonderful support base the stress has been as minimal as possible. Colleagues are covering my classes (Thanks Bill, and Mike, and Ron!) and friends are stopping by to pet the cat and prepare the house for our return (Thanks Matt, Rick, Bert, Kaye and Lloyd!). Hospitals are crazy, dangerous places, but we are doing OK. Thanks for all your calls and love. We look forward to seeing you in person when we get home.

This photo was taken by Alyssa when she and Dave Maloof came for a visit. Peace.

In the Washington Hospital Center - by Joan

Note: Joan is writing this post

I know that many of you are praying for Rick and wondering how he's doing. He told me I could go ahead and send this update. As you know, his left leg had been getting progressively weaker because of the tumor in his femur. He was able to get an appointment with one of the best orthopedic oncologists in the county (in the Washington hospital) for Thursday. I was supposed to give a talk in New Jersey that night so Alyssa drove him up from Salisbury (thanks Alyssa!). His leg was so painful and weak by the time he got there that they checked him in and planned surgery for Sunday. Angels Alyssa and Alex took care of him until I got there early Friday morning. On Friday he was scheduled for an MRI. As they were transferring him from his bed the femur gave out. Needless to say this was traumatic for both of us (and the attendants) and very painful for Rick. Eventually some great anesthesiologists got him comfortable (down the rabbit hole and into a magical wonderland) and then he spent the next 3 hours in the MRI machine (!). Saturday he rested as comfortably as possible, and Sunday morning at 7:30am was the surgery.

The doctor was very pleased with how the operation turned out. They replaced the top of the femur with metal. A high fever post-surgery was scary, but Rick is doing well now and we are hanging out in a beautiful private room decorated hotel -style with carpeting and couches. Of course Rick has been very kind and conversational with all of the hospital workers and they all love him. This afternoon they will make him stand on his new leg. We will probably be here a few more days and then head back to the 'bury.

Much love to all.....Joan and Rick

..OK,I've been a bit of a slacker,but there's a reason....nothing much has actually happened.Until today.But I'll go back.The pain in my leg,around the tumor,has gotten worse.So I made an appointment with Dave Cowall,the paliative care person,who is also a retired oncologist.He took me off morphine and put me on methadone..it's seems to help..some.I also got a wheelchair..very much fun,and necessary in some situations.I've also been getting lots of attention and visits from friends and relatives...sweet! Joan had made arrangements for a sisters gathering,as well as a catered dinner by Angela H.H. So,I'm there with 6 gorgeous women whom I have known as long as I've known Joan.We started the evening with a "mocsa" treatment that Joan was taught by our friend Matt Young,chinese medicine and acupuncture...took about 45 minutes.During the treatment,the sisters did a hands-on healing,said prayers over me...just an incredible,very moving experience..one I'll never forget,followed by a catered lobster dinner.We ate,drank wonderful wine,told stories,laughed,cried hugged for over 3 hours.Went to bed and had the best,most restful nights sleep I'd had in a long time.The next day as we hugged goodby,my friend from Maine,Dave McDaniel drove up to replace them.He's a very good friend we've known since before Joan and I were married.He gave up a job as CEO of a very large home health agency,and was building a hospice when he decided that he wanted to become a farmer...an organic farmer...and did it.I photographed his wedding on the 182 acre farm he and now wife Heather bought.He came down with a bounty that would cure any one of anything.Reishi mushrooms,vegtables of all kinds,fresh cows milk..direct...butter,unsalted..direct from his neighbor...on and on.It was amazing..is amazingWe laughed,cried,and ate more wonderful food.He left,and that afternoon,daughter Alyssa came in...wow! She has been pampering me non-stop as well. So then this morning,I get a call from Washington Hospital in D.C. They want me there tomorrow at high noon...followed by another call from my Angel Doctor Alex.She informs me that the NIH group met and has come up with a protocol,but I have a couple things to do: get an MRI of my spine,and get a chemical stress test.Those are in the works and should know at weeks end (hopefully). Meanwhile,Alex explains a bit of what the IL-2 protocol is.I look it up on the internet...and freak.The side effects are chilling.So...here I am...in the ring with El Toro...wondering if my cape is ready..strong enough..Mexico is still an option for me,and my friend Bill came out of the ring as a winner.My dilemma..my call..I'm just not sure yet.One day at a time...more later. I love you all,Rick

Another day in the ring

"One day at a time"...used to see those bumper stickers..didn't think much about them at the time.Now it makes so much sense to me.That's,in fact, what renews my spirit each day,makes me realize how fortunate I am.My life now revolves around one day at a time.Every day I am getting calls,and Emails,and visits.Every day my spirits "rise up against the rage".Every day I read all the blessings and well intended wishes,and prayers...most of all,the love that everyone is sending me..and I am healing.I can actually feel this...spirit that moves in all things.This collective consciousness is what finally will get me through...one day at a time.I have NO doubts,NO fears...thanks to you all.Thank you,thank you thank you

Here in the ring with the bulls....

Well...here I am..in a place I could never have imagined.I've photographed folks for hospice before and had a sense of their dilema,but you can't know really until your "in the ring".I do have some very incredible support..and I'll be using this space to keep anyone interested in my progress,informed as much as I can.I was diagnosed with renal kidney cancer just last Monday,the 20th Sept,because of a pain in my left leg...turned out to be a tumor...freaky! My ortho guy told me.."we're going to do every test known to man"..and did it.Bless him. In 1 week,I had a CAT scan,Bone scan,X-rays,blood work MRI,met w/oncologist,and 1/2 hour later,was in the ready room for biopsy.Absolutely amazing...I mean,this is Salisbury. All that info went to,or is going to NIH,where I hope to receive my care.That little diddy was taken care of by a special angel,Dr Alex Pratt,a very good friend,that just happens to work in that arena.She has garnered a team that is headed up by one of the country's besy Kidney surgeons.If accepted into the program,everything is FREE!!! We'll see...next week hopefully. If that doesn't get it,then my alternative is going to Mexico...no,not for vacation...for treatment.My good friend (i am so blessed) Bill Rolig has been through that bullring and come out the other side eating bull sandwiches.So,I've got plenty of "capes" for the future that all look very positive.Joan and I are as positive as can be and in great spirits.Son Dave flew here 2 days ago,and left yesterday,and will be back for the Halloween party.Yes,it's still a go damnit...are you serious? So,my present situation is this:I am on crutches because of the tumor in my left leg.It has thinned the bone around it to the point of being very fragile.It will likely need a rod down my femur (not a big deal,says my ortho guy)and possibly need some type of build up on the bone post-tumor.I have a spot on my rib,hip,right femur,..and foot???(weird,eh?). Yesterday I started a healthfood diet with different supplements,etc.I have several books (thanks Bill) on cancer that I've pulled some tricks out of and will follow for awhile...no reason not to.I feel really,really good about the direction this is all going.A note on the bright side...I get to try MM and RW..(medical? marijuana and red wine) ..a great healing combo!...Well,that's enough info for now.I'll keep you posted.Love to all...the Rickster